Humorous Wedding Speech Given by a Friend from Work

Humorous Wedding Speech Given by a Friend from Work

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Humorous Wedding Speech Given by a Friend from Work

Ladies and gentlemen, thank you.

And, on behalf of the bridesmaids, I’d like to thank Anthony for his kind words. I certainly agree that they did a great job today.

And as for the rest of his speech, I always knew he’d be hard to follow – but I didn’t expect an unintelligible, mumbled noise. Oh well, it only goes to show that just when you think you know someone well, they go and surprise you.

But in fact, I haven’t known Anthony for all that long. Anthony and I actually met about six years ago when we were working for the same company.

In fact, it’s rather amazing that we have become such good friends, given the relatively few occasions back then that he actually bothered to turn up to work at all.

But good friends or not, I do have a theory as to why he’s chosen me to be his best man and not one of his older friends. If you ask me, it’s because he didn’t want a best man who’d be able to tell you about all the embarrassing mishaps and misdemeanors of his youth.

Like the time, aged 15, that he was invited round to have tea with his first girlfriend’s parents and managed to walk dog poo across their new living room carpet.

I always thought that pale cream was an impractical colour for carpet. And, after that, afternoon, so did Sarah Bailey’s parents. And unfortunately for Anthony, Sarah herself found him to be a rather impractical boyfriend. And so that was the end of that.

And I’m sure his choice of best man was similarly influenced by a desire to keep under wraps the post-A-level pub crawl that led to him spending a night in the cells after vomiting off a bridge onto the bonnet of a passing police car.

Anthony, I hope you now see that it was never going to be that easy – which brings me onto your stag night.

Now, the men in the room will be aware of what goes on at a stag do and Anthony's was certainly no different. We did all the usual things – museums, a cream tea, a classical concert and a trip to the theatre … were not amongst them.

But considering there were 12 lads hell-bent on giving him a night he’d never forget - but probably rather would forget if they’d got their way – I think I did a pretty good job of looking after him.

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Actually, I can safely say that I didn't let him do anything he wasn't supposed to. But that job was made easier for me because those lap dancers wouldn't let him do anything he wasn’t supposed to, either.

But ladies and gentlemen, I don’t want to be the cause of Anthony and Linda’s first marital row, so I should reassure you – and her – that he was taken into that sleazy sin-pit against his own will and throughout the time there he looked about as happy as a turkey in mid-December.

And when it comes to things he does – and doesn’t - want to do, Anthony has a remarkable determination.

As you know, I first met Anthony when we were working together, but as we became friends, he confided in me that he wasn’t particularly happy doing what he was doing. I don’t think the boss that he had at the time helped much – but then I can be pretty unreasonable.

So I greatly admired the way that, after very careful thought, he left his job and went to university to study engineering. He obviously made the right choice because, four years later, he has a top degree and a job he loves. But more important than all of that, in his first course lecture, he happened to sit down next to the woman who today has become his wife.

But just a word of caution: Anthony, it worked for you that time, but it doesn’t matter how many jobs you jack in now because you're always going to have the same boss.

Ladies and gentlemen, on that note please join me in raising your glasses in a toast to Anthony and his new boss – to Anthony and Linda!
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